I just don't get it

I really do try to do the right thing in relationships with friends. Well, in all relationships, but the friend thing is the current imbroglio that has me in a state of discombobulation.

I do care about my friends. I suppose that sounds obvious, but I mean that I don't take them for granted. I have so few and those are precious. Also, I try to let them know, in various ways, what their friendship means to me. In an ideal situation, that wouldn't be necessary, but I think people like to know they are appreciated and cared about. So I do try to show it. That can be a challenge sometimes though. What do I say or do...or not say or do? Absolutely, different methods are required for different people.

And there are times when I try to do or say something that seems to me to be correct and caring. But the reaction I get afterwards, at times, leaves me totally baffled. I feel as if I have done something wrong. I feel as if I have left an insult or a hurt. At that point, I have no iota of an idea of what to say. So I say nothing. The quiet leaves me in the dark then. Did I do wrong or right? If wrong, what? If right, why the dry or negative reaction? I am not able to learn from a mistake if I do not understand the mistake, or even realize if I made one.

This is what has me pondering at this moment. I think that the care and maintenance of a relationship is one of the most difficult tasks that anyone can face. And it's something no one can teach in a class. Sure, there are classes and those classes have good and interesting ideas, but I maintain that it can't be taught. And the lessons one learns in the actually practice can be painful and long lasting...and obviously effect all the relationships that come later.

So...what the hell...